What's On My Mind...at 59: Life is short..........

Knowing life is short

Enjoy it

Day after Day

Moment after moment.

Suzuki Roshi,

Zen Master

A friend of ours sent my husband a clip from the Wall Street Journal titled Raging Against Aging by Henry Allen. This article terrified me. It describes a book called Losing It by William Ian Miller.

Mr. Miller is a professor at the University of Michigan Law School. He says he's "losing it" but continues to teach. The book's first line is a warning to the reader. He says; "Digression, cast adrift on the buoyant Dead Sea of your own narrations, is a sign of old age....the natural decay of the aging brain."

Allen summarizes Miller's message - "Old age is an annoying, ridiculous and pathetic decline toward the state of a turnip softening in the compost heap, if death is not kind enough to intervene first."

The article takes up an entire page - after reading it I felt depressed, really depressed. I don't want to be a rotting turnip. I want to be a special bottle of wine, getting better every year.

William Miller is only in his 60's, soon I'll be in my 60's. He says he's losing it, he repeats himself, his memory is not what it used to be.

Neither is mine..... and my hair is dryer than it used to be...... and age spots are appearing on my skin, seems like a new one every day...... and other things I'm not going to tell you about unless you come over for a cup of tea.

After reading that article I decided I could just go lay down on some railroad tracks or I could find my mantra for the next 41 years (I'm planning to live to 100).

This blog now has an official mantra.

Knowing life is short

There are monks that sleep in their coffins to remind themselves to live in the moment! Ha!

I'm a nurse. I spent years as a critical care nurse. I've taken care of a lot of people dying. All kinds of folks from a little baby born with her intestines sitting right outside her abdominal cavity to 103 year olds with feeding tubes who had been brain dead for years. I've held the hand of handsome, healthy looking 40 year old men with severely diseased coronary arteries having an acute massive heart attack when all the medicine and all the prayers and all the tears in the world wouldn't save them.

But I never really thought about just how short life is..... until now. Until I'm almost 60 years old.

Life is short. And there's not a damn thing you can do about it....... except you can love life and

Enjoy it

This is what is on my mind at 59.

You may have had the unique experience of knowing people with months or weeks or days or hours left to live. Or people who have been diagnosed with cancer or some other potentially fatal disease who have lived through it. Many, many of them go through a transformation from their experience. They become grounded in the wonderful attitude that life is very precious and sweet. Each day, no matter what, becomes a treasure.

Rainy days are a wonderful gift to them. The rain smells so fresh and alive. Food tastes fabulous. Oh, the difference between some lovely chocolate and a loud, crisp bite from an apple. They know that life goes up and life goes down and that is ....... life. When it is down........that is life. When it is up.....that is life. They are fully aware of what life is. They are appreciative of the up times as well as the down times. That is life. Sometimes it rains, it snows, the wind blows......sometimes not. Sometimes life brings you pure joy, sometimes confusion and loneliness and sadness. That is life.

I love this perspective.

Turning 60 in one year has been the catalyst that has really brought me to completely enjoy life....

Day after day

Moment after moment

I have always loved life but.........I've got a new perspective on "day after day/moment after moment". The days and moments are so much more precious and sweet to me.

If I live to 100 -

I have 14, 965 days left on this planet

21,549,600 moments (minutes) left

Allllll of those days and moments are so precious to me. And so sweet. I don't want to waste one single one.

**************************************************************************

Here are some beans soaking - Cannellini Beans (also called white kidney beans)

I sometimes use canned beans but only when I'm in a rush. Fresh cooked beans are so much more delicious. When I cook beans I boil some water, turn the heat off, add the beans and let them soak until they are all puffy - a couple of hours. And then I cook them.

There are few things I'm "anal" about (God, I hate that word, it makes me think of suppositories). One of them is not wasting one single bean. Have you read Night by Elie Wiesel? One of the reasons he survived the concentration camp was that he chewed and chewed. He chewed water, he chewed watery soup that had one lentil in it, or no lentils. Prisoners would have given their right arm for the 4 beans that were hiding in this bag. I never let even one tiny bean or lentil get tossed in the trash can.

I hope you enjoy this soup. It's full of good things for you.

While you are eating think of Elie Wiesel and chew, chew, chew. Another great book I recommend - You Are How You Eat. Chew, chew, chew until the food is gone. Chew 32 times.

Red Chard and White Bean Soup
Makes 4 servings

2 T olive oil + 2 T water
1 sweet yellow onion, finely chopped
2 medium bunches red chard, tear leaves to bite-sized pieces, chop stems and ribs
2 garlic cloves, minced
1/4 t dried thyme
4 cups veggie broth
3 cups cooked cannellini beans (drained and rinsed if canned {rinse them to wash the farts off - I'm not kidding})
1/4 grated parmesan cheese (Optional)

In large pot, heat oil and water over medium-high heat
Add onion, chard stems and ribs. Saute until softened, about 10 min
Add garlic and thyme and cook stirring frequently 1-2 min. until garlic is fragrant but not browned
Add broth and bring to simmer
Stir in beans and chard leaves
Cover and simmer until chard leaves wilted and tender, about 5-7 min.
Ladle soup into bowls and sprinkle with cheese if desired